MEALTIME INFIDELITY
where i work, we have this unnamed thing that i’ll call “mealtime infidelity,” which i have concluded is an actual thing because i’ve discussed it with other guys that work here. it means that since we get fed a lot (a common practice in post-production because we tend to work late hours), and since a number of us have significant others who don’t work the hours we do and expect that we will dine with them after work, we are constantly faced with the temptation of the free, hot, and often tasty catered meal right there under our double chins.
the right thing to do would be to stave off the hunger with a bottle of water and some self-restraint. the easier, and more easily-justified solution, however, is usually to eat once at work (which never feels indulgent, because, hey, we’re working - we deserve this), and then to force feed ourselves later with aforementioned loved one, who is never-the-wiser and never thinks to question the dollop of guacamole that’s nested in the crotch of our cargo shorts. because our better halves trust us to treat our bodies as temples, and our quality dinnertime as sacrosanct. and who in his right mind would eat dinner twice and why don’t his pants fit him anymore?
